The Plan

LOS ANGELES - A 30-year-old man died early Friday after losing control of his car on Virgil Avenue near Wilshire Boulevard in Silverlake and smashing into a light pole. Police said the man had pulled off Highway 101 about 2:20 a.m. and was driving north in an older model Toyota when the car veered, hit a vehicle in the next lane and crashed into the pole.

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Holy shit…what was that? Cat? Dog? I shoulda just hit the damn thing. Well, that’s it for this one. There’s no way my insurance is gonna cover this. Goddamned basic liability. Of course, I have zero medical insurance, so maybe I shouldn’t worry about the car just yet. No pain…..I think. Is that pain? What is that? This is pain in the same way that an earthquake is sound.

Hey, that’s a pretty cool phrase. I gotta remember that.

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I taste metal. Probably blood. Although, judging from the noise, I suppose it could be metal. Hell, it could be the fucking lamp post. I think I hear sirens. Are those sirens? Probably. Musta been able to hear this one from miles away. Little red car, what was that? Hope that guy’s okay. He probably called 911. Well, assuming he isn’t wrapped around his own light pole. Does that really happen? Is my car wrapped around a light pole? Can’t turn my head. I’m tired. I feel like I got punched everywhere all at once. By a giant. A mean one.

I hope they get here quick. This sucks.

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I’m glad I’m single. I’m gonna get enough lectures about irresponsibility from sisters and exes, the last thing I’d need is a wife piling on. Jeez, I feel like I’ve been here for hours. I know it hasn’t been, but come on man, this is ridiculous. There are like eight hospitals and three fire stations within earshot. I wonder if the Children’s Hospital would refuse to help me since I’m not a child. Maybe it was named after a guy. Dr. Children. That would be kinda funny.

Why is this taking so long?

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Okay, this is starting to freak me out a little bit. It has to have been at least an hour that I’ve been stuck here. Shit, I hope they don’t check your medical insurance before they get you. I don’t think I should have to die because I’m broke and stupid. But this is taking a long fucking time. What’s that story…the guy in Vietnam, he’s a prisoner, plays golf every day in his head, gets back and plays awesome golf.

Too bad I don’t play golf.

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I go through the door on the right, where I fight two of the big troll guys, and those irritating people pushing shit on top of me. Then I go back to the switch and go through the door on the LEFT. That way I can be sure I don’t miss anything. I just can’t remember how to get through that other fucking door. Honestly, like I need EVERY exclusive upgrade.

I don’t want to be here anymore.

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I’m gonna sing myself a song. Who cares if I can’t hear it, I’ll sing it on the inside. “We were out on a date in my daddy’s car, we hadn’t driven very far……”  Hehehe.

I wanna go home.

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Isn’t anyone coming? Should I just start screaming?

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Am I screaming? I can’t seem to feel anything or hear anything, so I can’t really be sure.

I wanna go home.

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Why is this so long? I don’t wanna do this anymore.

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I wanna go home.

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I don’t wanna be here anymore. I wanna go home. I’m scared. I want my mom. I wanna go home.

I wanna go home.

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The man was killed instantly, according to Lt. Rick Janicki. The other driver was shaken but not injured, he said. The identity of the dead driver was not released, pending notification of his next of kin.

LOS ANGELES - A 30-year-old man died early Friday after losing control of his car on Virgil Avenue near Wilshire Boulevard in Silverlake and smashing into a light pole. Police said the man had pulled off Highway 101 about 2:20 a.m. and was driving north in an older model Toyota when the car veered, hit a vehicle in the next lane and crashed into the pole.

—————————————————

Holy shit…what was that? Cat? Dog? I shoulda just hit the damn thing. Well, that’s it for this one. There’s no way my insurance is gonna cover this. Goddamned basic liability. Of course, I have zero medical insurance, so maybe I shouldn’t worry about the car just yet. No pain…..I think. Is that pain? What is that? This is pain in the same way that an earthquake is sound.

Hey, that’s a pretty cool phrase. I gotta remember that.

——————————————-

I taste metal. Probably blood. Although, judging from the noise, I suppose it could be metal. Hell, it could be the fucking lamp post. I think I hear sirens. Are those sirens? Probably. Musta been able to hear this one from miles away. Little red car, what was that? Hope that guy’s okay. He probably called 911. Well, assuming he isn’t wrapped around his own light pole. Does that really happen? Is my car wrapped around a light pole? Can’t turn my head. I’m tired. I feel like I got punched everywhere all at once. By a giant. A mean one.

I hope they get here quick. This sucks.

——————————————–

I’m glad I’m single. I’m gonna get enough lectures about irresponsibility from sisters and exes, the last thing I’d need is a wife piling on. Jeez, I feel like I’ve been here for hours. I know it hasn’t been, but come on man, this is ridiculous. There are like eight hospitals and three fire stations within earshot. I wonder if the Children’s Hospital would refuse to help me since I’m not a child. Maybe it was named after a guy. Dr. Children. That would be kinda funny.

Why is this taking so long?

———————————————

Okay, this is starting to freak me out a little bit. It has to have been at least an hour that I’ve been stuck here. Shit, I hope they don’t check your medical insurance before they get you. I don’t think I should have to die because I’m broke and stupid. But this is taking a long fucking time. What’s that story…the guy in Vietnam, he’s a prisoner, plays golf every day in his head, gets back and plays awesome golf.

Too bad I don’t play golf.

———————————————

I go through the door on the right, where I fight two of the big troll guys, and those irritating people pushing shit on top of me. Then I go back to the switch and go through the door on the LEFT. That way I can be sure I don’t miss anything. I just can’t remember how to get through that other fucking door. Honestly, like I need EVERY exclusive upgrade.

I don’t want to be here anymore.

———————————————

I’m gonna sing myself a song. Who cares if I can’t hear it, I’ll sing it on the inside. “We were out on a date in my daddy’s car, we hadn’t driven very far……”  Hehehe.

I wanna go home.

———————————————-

Isn’t anyone coming? Should I just start screaming?

———————————————-

Am I screaming? I can’t seem to feel anything or hear anything, so I can’t really be sure.

I wanna go home.

———————————————-

Why is this so long? I don’t wanna do this anymore.

———————————————-

I wanna go home.

———————————————-

I don’t wanna be here anymore. I wanna go home. I’m scared. I want my mom. I wanna go home.

I wanna go home.

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The man was killed instantly, according to Lt. Rick Janicki. The other driver was shaken but not injured, he said. The identity of the dead driver was not released, pending notification of his next of kin.